BYE! 2016

It's already the third week of 2017

I'm still mingle around to find out what to write 

And yet to say 

Back to school for the second week 

It's brings me nothing but stress life that start to appear in my head

It's a New Year 

Everyone wish to have some resolution ? 

People say that a new year brings new luck and anything 

Lot of wishes and bucket lists bear in mind in every single person

I think 2017 will become a great year to me, I wish 

I wish the year that I turned 21 brings me laugh and joy 

Don't mind that comes with some tears 

because sometimes people go ups and downs 

2016 was a shitty year for me 

It came with a lot of problems, make people depressed 

Maybe it means nothing to someone but 

I think i have had it enough, Yeah glad that is passed

Do you ever have this thought in your mind 

Like every decision you had made was wrong 

And you think about the attitude you have towards people 

Sometimes you asked yourself, am I worth of these 

When you went through it

All the things you ever hold up before turns shit 

This kind of process just keep repeating 

So there's the question 

You'll keep pretending nothing is happen

but deep down you can't deny it slowly changed 

But why ? 

Why this is happening 

I went through some mind breaking today 

Well, i'm gonna say that 

I not that good person nor perfect one 

There's a lot of problems and questions in me 

It was just so reconciled 

At that moments, i just want my mind to break down

I don't give a damn shit, ok 

I hate those voice and I hate those 'treat'

And I want to say Shut up 

The world is so cruel 

It makes you to face the truth and 

One day you just need to get up and keep going 

Put down all those unwilling things 

Try to be a stronger person ?

And the times come, you need to move on 

Well well well, this is the final/last mistake to me 

Promise to myself 

See the right things with your eyes 

Hear the right things with your ears 

Try to be more confident to myself ? 

Deal ? deal 

Hey Girl 

just want to shout it loud 

be better and more than it 

you can do it , CHEERS 

And so, HAPPY NEW YEARS 

Hug me august

Hey! still an odd opening for every time I start to write a post
So it is AUGUST already
Can't blame the times that slip out too fast
it's the matter that what we think about - we are out of times
Have I said that I'm starting a new semester right now ?
Uhmmm i guess nope . Yeah well, i am in year 2 sem 1 for now
This is not an easy job and easy things to deal with but
here I go, successfully passed all the subjects of last sem

Many seniors told that Sem 3 is a hard beginning
It's a new stage or step that I can call of
maybe we will touch or engage with kind of new/ weird things
But I just conclude it as a 'tough' Sem !
There's only two words i gave to myself - Be Ready

其实我觉得人与人之间都需要一点自己的空间
无论是多么要好的朋友
相处久了 摩擦一定会产生
而那只会导致越来越多的误会

I got a really bad tempered attitude sometimes
There's a big problems study in atchitecture - grouping
I can tell you the truth - your whole group assignments will screw
if you are so unlucky that grouping with some people
They are many types of sxxk person - lazy dude, later dude, invisible dude and most important
FOREIGNER

I feel blessed
maybe last semester my luck was totally suck
so this semester I got a normal team/ group
not to say any bad words about others
but sometimes I rather be grouping with my friend than my best friends
Argue will always happen when there's a group work
so it's more good to split it out

There's a thing here
------------------------------
I speechless for ard five minutes because I don't know how to write it out
my currently feeling and condition
One side is my best friend and the other side is the effectiveness
For me, I really want to group with other ppl that I never try
But I also considered that she need my support this time
I can;t just leave her there and enjoy my own
So, I really struggle - but it's okay
Everything is done and fine  I just need some times to get over - that's it !

uhhmm

Hey yo, it's really been a while
I never thought this blog was abandoned for almost three months
Three months can make things happens so differently in any ways



"When you’re the girl who is always there for others — you feel a lot.
You have depths within you, an ocean for a heart, and you keep falling
for people who are too scared to swim. You give and you give and you give; tearing pieces of your paper soul into the smallest of fragments just to set someone else a flame.



You hurt. My god, do you hurt.
You ache, wondering if someone will ever give you the love you so freely give to others,
wondering if there will come a time when someone asks how you are doing,
how you are coping, how you are healing.
And when that doesn’t happen, you heal yourself.
You find strength in things other than people.
You find energy in your solitude, you find hope in your daydreams.
You build yourself up, tell yourself that you don’t need anyone to save you,
that you don’t need anyone to steady your foundation. But you do.



See, sometimes the girl who is always there for everyone else, needs someone there for her.
Sometimes, the girl who smiles the biggest holds the biggest hurt.
Sometimes the girl who is always the person who wipes the tears of others,
goes home and cries lakes into the midnight hour.
Sometimes the girl who encourages everyone around her needs to be told that she is appreciated,
that she matters; sometimes she needs to be encouraged herself.
So, if you’re the girl who is always there for others, know that your heart is rare.



Know that you hold within you an ability to calm storms in people,
a beautiful gift that has relieved sore eyes and hurt minds.
Know that you give people hope,
that you inspire them by acknowledging the pieces of them most ignore,
that you make people feel wanted, that you make people feel like they have purpose.
However, also remind yourself that you are not invincible.
Your heart needs rest. You need rest.



Remind yourself that you do not need to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders,
that you may not be able to save everyone, that you may not be able to heal every hurt.
Remind yourself that you deserve to take all of the energy you put out into the world and invest it back into yourself from time to time.
That you are worthy of the love you keep giving to everyone else.
Remind yourself, that you don’t always have to be strong,
that you don’t always have to be the fixer.
Remind yourself that you can be human,
that you can ask for help; that you don’t always have to be the one to save yourself

- B. Sparacino

I'm tired, just like for almost all the times 

wondering why this kind of shit happening
sometimes you told yourself not to mentioned or think too much or harder
but that doesn't really work you can't barely control what your deep inside feel of 
It may hurt, but it seems real 

Hello May

I'm the type of person who ramble a lot when i feel panic, and somethings different that shocked me

I do realize how things and circumstance have change
I'm stuck in between to be or let it to be
I go on and go on about my problems, until the strange feeling inside me die off
and I proceed to do what I was doing


I'm really blessed that there's a space for me to jot down all of my feeling, my experiences
and things I feel deep down, it makes me relief for a moment when
I get depressed all along those 'night'
nobody can tell if i'm crying, laughing, smiling, raging behind the screen while typing
I can fully express how I feel while saying what i want to


Feeling doesn't cheat or fake
If that's what you feel, it really do
I used to care a lot for the things that really didn't meant anything
even it is just a tiny problems ( maybe it's not 'used to' )
sometimes when you care, doesn't mean they care
sometimes even when you don't care, they just don't give a fuck


I feel myself like a fool, being immature in handle things
' No matter how hard things may seem, there's always something good coming around the corner'
That is it. for the very last time ( for myself )
stop caring for the people that don't deserved
stop let them make your day down
you gonna live all by yourself because
what had happen is depend on how you react to it
Things will really get complicated, but things will get better


Here comes the new month of 2016, hello May
I wish it will be better than the previous
I wish I'll be a better person
I wish I could learn something in this month
and final wish is I hope all the people that I care stay healthy and happy always