Random again

I'm startIng to  find out that everytime I touch my blog, it's always gonna lead to bad mood + memories. 

I dunno Why, Maybe When you feeling freaking pass out or Moody, here always the best place  for you to write out what you really want to say. 

My baebe hamster passed away few days ago
I know the time will come But I din expected it comes so fast.  She lived with us for almost two years and a half.  I feel sad and sorry and the things I could do was buried her and said Rip.
She was so sweet that bring us the happiness .
She was so small that make us wanted to hug her forever in arm.
She was so weak after and struggled all these week.
She was a sweet angel and Still counting for me

the world is Still rotating but people change.
since When we dun talk to  each other
Since When we dun chat to each other
And since when we dun contact each other
I feel the distance and yeah.
These thing always happen

Today, chewan and me went for swimming
She want me to teach her how to swim and I
Not completely really know-how to *shy*
It's been so long after pmr.
Finally I back to swimming life again.
Gonna take care of my skin carefully becuz I dunwan back to the black skin of me again
It's so funny When I am in black skin
Totally loom like a smuft.

Love ya,  xx

oh so random

Hello guys, finally it is first of may already .
I just thought that I can't even manage to catch the tail of time again
there just flew away so much faster than i thought

actually i dun really know what to write but kinda has a feeling to update my blog
because i had nothing to do at home , except playing my online game
and it is not good for me becuz my mum always purposely dont like it
i should read all my novel that i bought last week and pay fully concentration on my 'weight lost'
been confuse by my cousin and now im totally indulge in the game
they all know i'm the one with 'half boiled heat'
after one week later and count for today, I had no mood to continue playing again


I know i should restraint myself or otherwise these whole holidays will be a waste.


Talk about April holidays, we have two days trip in melaka
well , although it's not what we planned before but Yeah
I had a great trip , feel totally crazy again
got back the feeling that already lost after high school graduation
just so much thankiu for the boys that willing to accompanied us all the days

was just wanted to post pictures but suddenly crap and broken . ' what a waste'


before I write this post, I read again and again other blogger's post
and i feel like , wow
there are so less people who is still continue their blogging life.
especially those high school friends


Miss all the moments that we jot down the things that had happen and those memories
and seriously I really dun wan to grow up .
I want to be a kid always , free from anything
Free from pressure
free from argue
free from hypocritical
free from upset
free from time ( always think time is not enough )


I know i should think more positive
but i just feel there is so much different compare to where we from


I was happy all whole day, i get up early jogging with mum
take a shower and rush for work.
patiently treat and teach all the kids
back to home to take a nap
at night, i was totally different from morning
i was grumpy , i was negative
and i think too much that is just not so good at all
i feel helpless and nothing can i do


I am weird . hate it 99
I don't know.
But then again, I would question myself how much effort have I really put ?
Don't think too much and treat the world like there is always a hope for you

this moment

Ain't nobody know you so deep that you know yourself.
Sometimes people always tell others like : ‘ Hey, I know this guy very well'
Is it really true?
Maybe you know how he/she the way he/she do, know he/she daily life action
but deep down their heart, there is always a private space for themselves
I guess is true.

I always hope a friendship will long lasting forever, like fo-ever
Nothing can beat this friendship , like there's a strong bonding between


I never meant to make more friends as others cuz i'm an introvert person
I barely could just sit aside and watch guys talk themselves
I don't mind to be ignore , and actually I enjoy it
Sometimes people talk to me , ' You look totally different when truly know you' blablabla
This kind of words actually exhilarate me , totally .. Ha

When i care something, I really care about it
I'll do what is the best for it becuz I enjoy doing it
I appreciate everything that happen between this relationship and never meant to lost it

Kinda of days like, i'm in my own excitement
this really happens and i feel im the one who care too much
and me, myself feel vexed all these times
am i too over reacted or did i think too much
no ideas at all
im sick of it

everyone is different
do not expect others to think what you are thinking
maybe the things you treat it like precious is the one that people dont even give a shit
you treasure this friendship  you think you are one of it and
sometimes you dont even know that there are no space for you already
they have their own circle own social circle own friendship circle
dont expect too much  it hurts you really bad when you fall deeply down
becuz it's just don't work that way


'You'll end up real disappointed if you think people will do for you as you do for them. Not everone has the same heart as you'

expectation kill everything  that's right
this is how i feel right now . i duno what will i feel the next morning but this moment
i feel bad, really really bad.
is time to go bed , goodnight
love ya, xx

Say hello to my holiday

Say Hi again..  I'm finally back from my busy uni life and homework + exam.

So Today, I'd finish my final exam and starting my holidays ~~~ been busy packing all the stuff and clothes into my luggage because I ammmm gonna move out from my hostel.
It's been a year, If I say that not gonna miss here - This is all just a lie, Haha.  I miss all those things that happened here, people I met, days we been through, and how we talk east talk west about everything. There're all just so sweet and memorable.

I'm Still bother about where should I stay When I move to north wings.  *sigh*
Apparently, I want to live outside becuz it's more free and more cheap than hostel ever again. No lie ** But in the other side, I struggle a lot and I feel like Maybe hostel is more suitable for me?  No idea
My mum is the one who completely dislike, reject, and donwan me to stay outside.  Too many reasons that make me feel like
* Maybe I shouldn't stay outside ,should stay in hostel *  am completely compelled

I want to make my own choice, you know. Those kind of things.  When you make a decision, sure that you hope your closely  one will stand by your side and gib you any advice you need .

These things just not gonna happen on me ..

I know my family just worry about me , they want me to be safe, stay away from dangerous.
But i just cant stop thinking that, why wont you just let me try for one time? Maybe that will be fine, everything is just be alright  . No robbery, no rappers, no pick pocket . I'll make sure to keep myself safe

Anyway, yeah ! Everything will be OK
Mum always the best, mum always correct  haha
She gb the best thing for me . Not for own sake

And how's my life going , i think there was something came up without my consciousness.
It's been a messy and busy month.
No phone, no call, no text , just photo !