2013年12月1日

2013-12-01

As the time passed , we all are growing up . So fast . Come to the end of the year , happy December . 


I gonna to say that . November is the trouble month for me . 
I started spm in this month 
And many things happen in this month.

The latest , I was sent to hospital again 
Just because of that stupid fellow things about the period , woman's things .
I was mad  anger ? How weak is my body and I can't even handle it . 
It's fucking pain , and you gonna believe that I'm not lying . I cried like losing control , I knew I scared my mum . But I didn't had the choice . It make me crumble . Hopefully , my entire life will getting better and stay away from this silly sickness . 


Well it's grate to say : left one paper for me In December ! 
So , I think I put effort on some objects , and the left . I'm just say I try my best .
That's the word : pay more gain more .
God bless me !!! Although I'm nt a Kristian 


Friendship , it hard to say about it .
I realize evertime I touch my blog 
I always want to say something's about friendship . 
We argue . I think so . And I just want to give up and forget all those things happened . I felt dissappointed . Why you 
Not the one who told me the things 
At first ? Okay , I'm just really focus in those things . Maybe some kind of friend 
They didn't even bother . 
For me , I want to know things you had decided from you own , not the other who should told me about your stuff 
You know how i fell ? 
I feel awkward and sad . It is so bad . 
Hey you're kidding me z 



After the last paper , maybe I'll find a job for myself ? 
Learn to be a discipline girl , don't worry my mum . It just a suggest 
Lol , I didn't even think I can do it . 



Just simply update , here to say 
Goodnight dearest , sweet dream always 

2013年11月2日

I love my mama , always and ever .

Piss off

Getting to tear up 
What should I do ? 
I knew it since learn to be independent 
I am truly idiot and bustard 


Always try to get this things fix 
But it always bring screw up to the end . 
Sad case ! How terrible day

Did you ever care about people feeling 
Just one time , you never 
You talk what you want to say
You split it out 
You tear the scar of people 
And you just dun think you're wrong 
You are freaking a dick . 

How awkward when there are seeing you 
They trust you believe you rely on you 
And you just broke what that give to you 
You shout out what you meant 
And don't understand how stupid you are
Just learnt to be care 
To the people who love you 
To the relative 
And yet , your family .


Sometimes , I just hope that sorry can make things easy 
But that is just ridiculous .
Don't even think that when you're saying out , people who get hurt will recover . 
There're still here 




2013年10月30日

告别高中生涯

2013 - 10 - 30 
毕业典礼在今天举行了 
像往年一样 , 分校学生都回总校一起庆祝
礼堂不大不小 、 但是给我了一个快乐的回忆 

昨晚严重失眠,黑眼圈应该变严重了
失眠不是因为太兴奋、 而是渐渐习惯失眠的日子
早上到了茶餐厅 、亲手拿了我所设计的班服、朋友问起有没有成就感的那一刻
我真的觉得幸福满满 、这大概谁第一次那么认真对待一件事物

我喜欢画画 、画出各种各样的生态 
所以这就叫兴趣呗 不论丑或美


我不喜欢总校 或许因为不是自己待惯了的地方 排斥感有那么一点点
我也不喜欢那里的学生或老师
觉得在那里的我完全被无视 你在哪里什么都不是


今天的日子有点感触 
朋友哭泣的时候  眼泪差一点跟着掉落 
我告诉自己不能哭 今天是开心的日子
分离的那一天还没来临


你问我 伤不伤感 : 没有的话 是假话吧
我在振华就读五年 认识也结交了不少朋友 
人生嘛 总有去 总有留 
有些形同陌人。有些好到能一起吃同样的和同样的


其实我觉得自己占有欲蛮强的
看到自己认为的好朋友也能跟别人那么好  心里有股冲动 xxxx
但我时常告诉自己 他们不是你的所有物 
你没资格拦阻 
尽量与所有人相处 慢热的我
有时会很累 。
羡慕那些人 羡慕那些事 
其实我也只不过活了17 年


有谁没犯过错 有谁没失误过 
我不知道我现在是以什么养的心情面对考试 
我只知道 考不好 前途没了 希望没了
尝试的机会也会丢失
我日夜用这话语催眠 安慰自己
这是我的救生圈 。 


我没有小说里所谓的百分百勤劳 
偷个小懒 谁不会呢? 
我想要的是什么  、 想实现的事?

等着吧。我会找出自己的钥匙
打开那所谓属于我i 的未来 





2013年10月13日

Noted !

JUST BEFORE THE DAWN , WHEN THE LIGHT'S STILL GONE
SHINE SHINE YOUR WAY .


well , start my blog with the song lyrics .
shine your way - the croods
i guess is the most like song for me , these days
Because , when i feel like i mostly lost my way , i'll hear it .
It's a good guide . HA !


And , i wont update the blog today if someone don't rush me .
Feel so touch that you know somebody is concern about you |
and always follow your status .
LA..La..  and you know who am i talking about /


O)kay , start to write about my situation
arhg .... now the date is 10/13 already
time really make people anxious
MY spm is getting close and close ...
Finished my second trial exam \
i just taught that this exam really waste mt precious time .


Orz , this month i stop my data .
Maybe i think it could concentrate myself .
i think this really works , but less chat with bro and friends also /
but i determine myself? ?? LOL i will  open it again after spm


Next, my class is prepared the graduation performance
and i'm not taking apart .
the T-shirt , i guess we can't have it before the graduation days \
really feel sorry to this thing


So , after Spm what should i go for study ?
I have my own opinion .
what i persist is not study in UTAR
I knew many of them said that this is a very good campus
But , all i want is
get myself in a new enviroment .
New school , New place ,new friends .
errrrrrrrrrhhhhhhhhhhhhh , hopefully it wont screw up .


so , just skip other things . I will blog it again sooon

2013年9月13日

This is ... Life

Perfectly , things go through in what it supposed to be . 

I'm still in where I belong to , life goes on

Trial exam is finally really over . 
Feel like it is not important anymore ?
I just guess that , maybe ... Suppose .. Or .. Just need to let things go 

You messed up this time , you put more effort on it . So , this is the words I should remember it for the continuosly months . 
Hope it really works on me . 


Seriously , I knew my Chinese subject was out of title . Hopping that it will not that worst than I thought . Geeeeee


And , it's happy to say 
My own class graduation trip 
Was finally , completely settled . 
I knew how terrible the job was , 
And I knew I won't success it without my friends . They helped me a lot . Thanks so much .


Far and far , now we are discussing on our t-shirt ... Well , I guess I'll try my best to do it 
Just  dun really want the things happen again . Buzzz



Ahh , this few days, I'm watching the global we are married . 
Honestly , I like guigui and tachyeon , pretty love this couple . 
I was touched by tachyeon when that times he gave the proposal to guigui 
Tears drop !!!!! Romantic lah 
Althought I think he is not such enthusiasm at guigui , but I can feel how real is his smile whenever they were together . Guiiiiiguiiiii is the cutest lah...


Actually , I still have so much to type it out . Whenever I feel cold , I hope that someone will realize it . Not hoping your help or anyelse , just hope that someone could understand me . Say it out deep in my heart . 

Goodnight , world . Tomorow is the better day for me and for yours .





2013年9月6日

倾诉

每个月的几天, 都感觉特别颓废
或许只是思想的太多 、 自己给自己烦恼
这个月进行trial exam 实话实说 我并没有那么的充份准备 
非常羡慕那些读书技巧厉害的人,佩服啊佩服啊 


怎么说呢、今天试考高数呢 
对我打击非常大 、 拿到考卷的那个时刻
我败下了 。 
我总以为凡事做事都对自己有信心
才能靠得更好的结果
但是现实本来就没我们想象的那么简单
这一次考不好、 下一次在努力
我们还有多少的时间可以重来 可以浪费?

就因为对自己有信心、 我对自己的要求都很高  失败的时候、 那种感觉真不好受。 摔得真的很痛 

当作没事 劝自己看开点 、事情终会变好
我把目标推得远远的 远距离看着他 
感受被遗弃的滋味 、累得想大笑

或许是我太复杂、把世界看得太颜色化
追寻新的刺激 新的启发 新的希望
其实是想把自己活得更精彩、靓丽动人


其实心里最在意是别人的评论
我还是想说 :
dot judge people by his cover . 
你不是我 、你不懂我 
你和我相处的时间 我用手指头都能算出
我不喜欢讲话? 很酷很硬脾气得什么的
不了解就别随便说出 你没资格 
我承认自己对人处事不自然 
但实话这里有一句 : 你没好到能让我发自内心看待你 是你没那么本领 怪不得人






2013年8月23日

Haze gonna take me off

Well , here am I . After passing through this month , really need to put great effort at it . So , I just do whatever I can , and I can't give My words that I will get it .


I duno how to start my words 
Maybe it's too much of rubbish to say 
I'm in the horrible situation .

The most important thing that influence me a lot this month is the class 
There are so many suck stuff happens 
For the first , I just wanna to talk about my graduation trip for this end of year .
Anger was fully fill in my heart when I started planned these or those
Maybe , maybe that not their fault ,
Maybe is because we are just different 

You are so different than I thought 
You you you and yours z  suddenly I just felt dissappointed 
For all the attitude that I saw 



I'm not judging everyone in my class , 
Just need a way to relax and talk some kind of messy stuff .


Dun ever tears you drop for a useless reason , I hate it and I'm done for it .
There is not the way to do for this , and maybe you just need to be 
More brave and independent .

2013年8月3日

Lifeless

Ugh , Sunday is the day I like the most 
No tuition , no need wake up early 
And , no stress . 

Feel free to laugh at yourself , even you Do something that normally calls for embarrassment . 
Do you often think that you look quite idiot in front of others?  


Keep answering myself why and why 
Though I knew it won't have any result 


Next , starting my holiday and I prefer playing to studying all the times I stick with my lovely books 

Well , now I'm in the hair salon , accompany my mummy 
That's  a baby crying to her dad because she didn't want to cut her dumping hair haha 
And I not quite sure whether she is she/he . Lol

Do all the good you can by all the means you can ,
In all the way you can , in all the places you can 
At all the times you can,to all the people you can 
As long as you can ! 



2013年8月2日

Day by day

Hey guys , here I come 
After so many days or month , I probably think that should update my blog .

Okaysss , just a simple and short detail 
My school is having holidays , for about two weeks . It's the time to relax or you can say - its time for spm students to put on their effort . 
Countdown already had began since last week 
And 90 something days for spm 
30 something's days for trial spm

Pressure days from this moment . 


I plan that I should study hard for this two weeks and having on diet again cuz I realize I'm getting fat ! Lolz , maybe it's 

I do have many friends , normal friend , nice friends , real friends , best friends and' fake' friends . 
Appreciate what I have now , although it didn't sound like that 


These days , I always think of him 
Ya , probably is I miss him a lot when I heard someone talking about him again . We're not friend anymore , hmm I think is ? Almost one year , wish thing can go through more better than today . 

Stay calm , keep walking .


And , want to share some feelings that I love it so much at here . 
I got a brother which we call 'Kai' didi
In Cantonese  or Chinese .
I love depend on others when I truly think he/she is the one that I treat him like he did it for me too

He looks super cute in my eyes , although he like to argue with me , make fun and have some wierd attitude .
I think baby is a mindful man to girl/woman 
Today having dinner in Mami house 
I feel terrible touched when he act like that to me !!! How sweet and blessed.
Most important , I love them , very much 


Don't let it break you , whether  its hard or tough 

Miss my bro too , too many many many months didn't meet and I almost forget his pig face . Just hope he will take care of himself  , don't always get sick , and be happy always .


Lastly , for my family , my friends , my sweethearts , may god bless you . God  always in our heart .




2013年6月22日

Blanks

Today is Saturday !
A great great happy day for me 
I enjoyed my time with my lovely mummy 
And my dearest Grandma .

I feel there're many things to talk 
But I guess it all gone when I start typing 
Okay , fine ! 
I just write whatever I remember 
And something that I kinda want to say 


First , is about my mid year result .
I get some improvement in some subject 
And other just didn't change or drop 
The sad thing was I failed sejarah 
In this time .
Really disappointed to myself ,but I knew that I'm not study it probably .
So this is the result I get ,and is hard for me to tell my mum !
Hope she won't too mad or too sad at all
God bless me 


Next ,recently I keep searching about the way to keep fit , or can say 
On diet ! 
Girls won't say themselves are slim .
Just because they are girl 
For me ,us the same !
And I gonna take some sexy photo and 
Let it be my reminder haha I think it'll work . 


I want to improve my English 
Maybe it's the time to enhance the vocabulary . I still remember my English teacher give a comment for mine essay 
Worst! 
It's quiet sad because I thought it will better than last time .
Catch us if you can ......
Our school literature ,and I really love it 
Before sleep ,having a small chapter and it'll help you sleep more comfortable and quickly .



Today ,going to cinema again 
I think it is the fifth movie I saw in this month 
I'm the fan of movie !! Okay 
And I'm gonna find a patner who also interested in it ! 
It's just an advice from my mum 


See ya later ! End bloggggg


2013年5月27日

Midnight of the day

Hey guys, know what the days now?
Okies! It's holidays.
First, have to tell yours Happy holidays for about two weeks.

January, February, March, April, and this month is May. Times really gone fast
For me, spm is getting closer and closer. And ,the mid year exam over ald, what my feeling was. I finally get through it,
Really really gonna say it, I did all the subjects by myself!  In those three weeks, I thought I may die or tired until can't sleep, I re-study all the subjects as more as I could.
And what I want to say is, I didn't cheat during exam!!!  I did it all by myself
Ugh, just forget about whether it's wrong or incorrect,  and there a little bit tricky question need to be asked sometimes. But, seriously I did it without cheating and questioning anymore.

I thought it may a good beginning for me, and I gonna keep this until the end .
Support?  Hahahah sureee !

Next, last Saturday went to Taylor's university with school team and friends.
We met new friends and have so much of funs I never had.
Those sweets memories and pictures are the best things that proved .

I'm a driver now , drive my own car, it really exciting and extremely _____
Don't you ever thinking that one day you put up your shoes, steps into the car and control it by yourself.
What I feel is, such fantastic

Seventeen girl, 
For the next ten years, there's a twenty seven woman.
She might be gorgeous, talent, faithful, adorable, failure, unmistakable
There's no such things of get to know of  future, and prepared before it.
What she can do is,
Follow your heart, do what you want, whatever is it, wherever it be, whenever it happened, you won't feel guilty because you already did it, don't you?

I'm not going to say what I did  or think is mature . But I gonna proved that I'll never regret and confuse the passed.
Sometimes it hard to adapt and accept,but everything need to try before you make the conclusion.

Hope and prefer never have the same meaning. I hope you can do the best, but whatever you choose, I support you as long as we been together.
I prefer you to do the right things,it doesn't mean that I rejected the choice you make, it just probably not right at all, and I'd find the better way for you.

I'm just fine with all the things that mixed with love. I know I may never show it, but it really make me think that I'm disgusting for it.
Girls, if you never trust your boys, for only once ,so why did you have a relationship with them?  Did it so great to have this type of action? Guess you never know that best friendship care about feeling, not the motion ,pictures and conversation. None of it.

In my secondary school
Form one, I still remembered I was a fatty girl. I met one girl that special for me.She is quite shy, and quite anytime. Because of her, study is not a hard works for me.
Form two, I met my best friend and best boy friend. She's caring, taking care of me all the times, we knew each others and get better by the time passed. He gave me a good image when we first met, tall, white and shine eyes all the time.
They're my best friends ever and ever

Form three, this was a crazy year for me. He the one who give happiness and craziness for us. And, he's the one who make me feel that he is very very shy and unsuitable with them ,at all .
But, there's mistakes always. Although they have different attitude, but they are the noisiest boys in that class.
I'm proud of them

Form four, separate class finally
We're all in different class, as usual
This year, he's the one who most close with me, we having same tuition, talking together, playing together. Best memories always gone fast.

Form five, this is the last year for me in secondary school.
I'll fulfill the days that left.
And making it a best conclusion at the last of the pages.

Thus, goodnight to my dearest, sweet dreams, my love will always be with yours.

2013年4月5日

四月的晚上、

















我想你了 ,希望一刻都不离开你


三月假期终于结束了 ,生活回到轨道上
开学的日子还是一样让人想睡觉
但我会用心、专心、努力、对待每一件事


我对自己许了一个愿望 、有点不切实际
但有希望总能达到的
这个大大的愿望 装忙了许多小小的希望
我不用口说 、时间总能证明一切
让我们对未来的自己加把劲





觉得自己有恋母情结
母亲刚离开的第一天 、思恋沾满我的心
就好像等待着糖果的小孩、盼望妈妈的归来
妈妈常说 、这是人生之路
好好享受这一路的旅程 、 是身为孩子的责任


我非常依赖她
我不懂这是好事 还是坏事?
但起码 、我不排斥
习惯什么时都对你说 、聊聊彼此 、说说闲话
啊 , 感慨女生总是这样
你是我心灵的支柱 T^T


每次听朋友对我的看法
刚开始不认识觉得很斯文 、 认识了觉得不像女的
朋友对我的了解
母亲桥身惯养的小公主
每次听了 、都会觉得有一点点的失望
我不否认 、但我也没同意
我想表达的是 、每个女孩都是自己父母眼中的公主

某某时刻会有不同的心情与想法
我有过两种
我很骄傲 、能过作为妈妈的小公主
这是无人能代替的
我自信、我潇洒 、我洒脱
一句话  、 我活的毫无顾虑

我会愤怒
接着会开始检讨自己哪个举止让人有这样的想法?
迫切希望自己快点长大  、学会独立 、自立和自律
我又会开始碎碎念 、胡思乱想 !


近路四月头了、 重复对自己说要加倍努力 、
我害怕 让任何一个对我有期望的人失望
这感觉 、并不好受
但我知道自己几根葱
很多时候 、人总是喜欢在嘴上说说而已
可能他们真的有认真想去完成那件事?

我又给了自己一个问题了
暂时什么都不想、 读书最快乐 、最重要 !

2013年1月19日

A girl's Dream




The painter has the Universe in his/her mind and hands

When i was a kid , i start drawing , painting . 

If you ask me  , why you like to draw so much ? 
I really duno , i think i'll answer you about
I like Drawing , it means my life . when i have a pen in my hand 
my mind will start thinking and create much and much idea. 
And it is great . very great .
because , I do love it .


I'm in my own world , nobody will disturb you . 
What you need to do is , enjoy yourself in your art .
I believe in what i do and in my art or music ,
and in that respect you can call me that ,
I believe in what i'll do , i i'll say it out . 


I wish to be a designer , or an artist . 

I wonder to spent all my life in this regard . 
IT EASY TO SAY AND HARD TO DO IT 
For a 17 years old girl , thier future is very important .
And i've thought , I 'll be an architecture .SOON .
my mum had encourage me to do art . 
If i like to , she wont stop me .
and i really want it . 
But i not dare too , such annoying to myself . 


I admire those painters . 

They just like discard everything  , 
I dunno . what is their feeling ? 
It must be so great 
Maybe just have someone who never know what they are , 
but i think i get it . 
Cause i believe , Imagination rules the world . and myy world .


Everyone have their own pie in the sky . And i proud of mine . 


Because when you love something , 
you want to do it all the time, even is no one paying you for it 
At least that's how i felt about drawing.


Maybe , I'll be an artist ? Do I ? HAHA  

this such thing cannot be expected . But if in the future 
I really an artist , and i would say to myself .
You gain your world , and done your dream .




.

2013年1月1日

Dear xxx :

I'm 17 . a form five student . All i want to say is : New year New life .
It's hard to believe , time really flues fast . Today is open school day
5 murni , my new class . i have new friend , and some old friend in ths class
I sit alone in this classs , this year .
Hmmm, it's a rare feeling . I feel uneasy . It has a empty space beside you
make you so scared . and
you dont even need to talk  . LIke , face a wall .
I'm sad , and a little bit mad . for the teacher , and my friend
I dont want to break up two of them . though we are closest
I think im a bad guy , although they are well-intentioned
I am very uncomfortable , today .
I feel like im lost to rely . someone had left me alone
i told my mum just now , she sad : slowly get used to
You get more attention . more independent , more hardworking
Did i really could handle it ?
I dun no
Maybe it's a chance for me .
Seize this opportunity , change it , and you be a more great girl .
One year , I really hope it gone fast .
All i need is . courage .



.